{"id":685,"date":"2004-10-09T18:53:04","date_gmt":"2004-10-10T01:53:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kattywilly.com\/blog\/?p=685"},"modified":"2004-10-09T18:53:04","modified_gmt":"2004-10-10T01:53:04","slug":"youll-never-know","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/?p=685","title":{"rendered":"You&#8217;ll never know"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Halley <a href=\"http:\/\/halleyscomment.blogspot.com\/2004\/10\/what-well-never-know.html\">talks about something<\/a><br \/>\nthat I think about quite frequently.&nbsp; With me the question was<br \/>\nposed &#8220;do you think things would be different if Cindy were still<br \/>\nhere?&#8221;&nbsp; I know that is a silly question, obviously had she not<br \/>\ndied things would be totally different.&nbsp; The girls would still<br \/>\nhave mother and I wouldn&#8217;t be a widower.&nbsp; Yes things would be<br \/>\ndifferent.&nbsp; But the question that runs around my brain at 3:00am<br \/>\nis would Cindy have responded to this crisis or that differently.&nbsp;<br \/>\nFor me the most bothersome thought is that if she were here my girls<br \/>\nwould have someone to be there with them on the school field trips, a<br \/>\nroom mom that was actually their mom.&nbsp; Someone to go to with those<br \/>\nprivate personal issues that no girl would ever want to talk to her dad<br \/>\nabout.<\/p>\n<p>So in an attempt to be more like Cindy was for them I have to grapple<br \/>\nwith the regular thoughts of whether it is possible for me to work even<br \/>\nfewer hours to be &#8216;there&#8217; more for the girls and still be able to pay<br \/>\nthe bills, to keep a roof over their heads.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Halley talks about something that I think about quite frequently.&nbsp; With me the question was posed &#8220;do you think things would be different if Cindy were still here?&#8221;&nbsp; I know that is a silly question, obviously had she not died &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/?p=685\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-685","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/685","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=685"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/685\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=685"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=685"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=685"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}