{"id":791,"date":"2005-03-20T11:58:15","date_gmt":"2005-03-20T18:58:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kattywilly.com\/blog\/?p=791"},"modified":"2005-03-20T11:58:15","modified_gmt":"2005-03-20T18:58:15","slug":"those-days-of-emotion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/?p=791","title":{"rendered":"those days of emotion"},"content":{"rendered":"

Halley is talking about some things today<\/a> and as I read them I had that, “hey! I’ve done that too!” feeling.<\/p>\n

One of the things she talks about is the Palm Sunday church
\nservice. She describes it from a view she has outside the church
\non one of those long winter just turned to spring days. The kind
\nwhere there are still plenty of reminders of the long hard winter that
\nhas been and sometimes may still yet to be even when the calendar says
\nthat it is officially Spring. My last winter in the Chicago area
\nwas one of those. We suffered the indignity of an April Fools day
\nblizzard that year. Those early springs are ones that are filled
\nwith more hope for spring than actual spring. She describes the
\neffects of the big piles of snow that keep holding on even though the
\nweather is warm enough to melt most of it. These piles of grey
\nand dirty reminders of the deepest the winter had been able to force us
\nto dig to make our way through our daily tasks. It forces our
\nnormally neat and organized lives to become more random and
\ndifferent. The normal nicely arranged lines of cars parked in the
\nlot outside the church turn into a wild looking scene of cars parked in
\nall manner of different angles and arrangments, none of which seem to
\nhave any organization to them.<\/p>\n

She also talks about plam fronds and the rituals of the Palm Sunday
\nservices. I remember as a child going to Palm Sunday
\nservices. They were one of my favorites for some of the same
\nreasons I just described above. They were different from the
\nnormal services. We dressed different, there were those special
\nhats the ladies wore, the practice of handing out the palm
\nfronds. For a young child these palm fronds are almost like
\nsimple toys. Something to play with. I would try to imagine
\nwhere all these palm fronds came from. Were there palm farms
\nsomewhere? How did they grow them in the winter when it was so
\ncold and miserable? I undserstand now where all those palm fronds
\ncome from \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

She talks about driving behind a large vehicle and not being able to
\nsee the road ahead. I have on occasion become so frustrated that
\nI would do as Halley did and try to pass just to feel more comfortable
\nand safe being able to see the road and traffic ahead. I have
\nalso done the opposite and done my best to drive a little slower to
\nallow more of the road ahead to move from in front of the big vehicle
\nin front of me to to behind it. I have also on occasion purposely
\ntried to stop at a light that the big vehicle was able to go through
\njust to take me out of that situation. I drive different than I
\nused to now.<\/p>\n

Finally the thing that Halley talked about the really gave me the “I’ve
\ndone that feeling” is when she stops to take some time to cry.
\nAlthough I have to admit, as I have heard from many other widow and
\nwidowers, that we do some of our best crying in the car rather than
\nout. In the first months I would never have been able to go
\nanywhere if I couldn’t cry and drive. The car was about the only
\nplace that I could feel alone with my feelings. It was also the
\nonly place where I had the time to think about things. The rest
\nof my days were spent trying to be a single parent of two girls working
\nfull time. And as Halley says crying is one of the best ways to
\nrelease. Those first few months were filled with so much emotion
\nthat it felt like at times we were exploding. Long hard crying
\nsessions were the only way I could find to release them. There is
\nsuch a feeling of calm and release once I was done.<\/p>\n

Years later I sometimes long for those days of emotion.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Halley is talking about some things today and as I read them I had that, “hey! I’ve done that too!” feeling. One of the things she talks about is the Palm Sunday church service. She describes it from a view … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-791","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/791","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=791"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/791\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=791"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=791"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kattywilly.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=791"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}