KattyWilly

I posted some photos from this weekend, and last week.

Happy Birthday Lindsey

One of my worst nightmares is the thought that I will forget something very important.  And I’m not thinking something like the one time I forgot it was Cindy’s birthday until sometime around noon.  No I’m thinking things more along the lines of this poor man who forgot his baby in the back seat of his car. 

Now I realize that I don’t have to worry about that particular thing any more, but there are other day to day tasks that I fear I will forget and end up with a child across town waiting for me to pick them up.  Or leaving the candle burning, or the stove on or some other such forgetfullness that can cause great damage.

The article quotes a brain researcher who says, “Day-to-day stress won’t affect brain function. But persistent stress combined with a sense of helplessness can be toxic to the brain.”

Going through the process of grieving you have plenty of stress and at times there certainly is hopelessness, but mostly that leads to forgetting to pay bills, or paying them twice, or putting the milk in the cupboard and the cereal in the fridge a la About Schmidt.  We widowed folks call it widder brain.

And any single parent probably lives in a constant state of persistant stress.  I know I do.

I have a few Hayley, Halley,  Haley ‘s in my world.

Hayley is my daughter’s flute teacher.  Chelsey just loves Hayley and is always so excited to go to flute lessons.  She has really improved and just recently received a belated birthday gift of a nice, really nice, new open holed silver flute.

Halley of Halley’s Comment is one of my favorite reads on the Internet.  Being a single parent she always comes up with interesting tidbits about what it’s like raising our children.

Haley is the daughter of one of Cindy’s cousins.  She has Cancer.  CaringBridge is a service that provides a web site where families and friends can follow the progress of patients as they battle their illnesses.  I have been following Haley since shortly after she was diagnosed.  It is hard to find the words.  As much pain as I’ve been through I can’t imagine what it is like to go through this.

I remember the days when the kids would yell at me, “Dad! leave me
alone I can do it myself!”  We, I guess it’s just I now, 
have raised the girls to be in some ways strong and independent. 
To have confidence that they can do things on their own.  I think
that is a good attribute to have in one’s personality.  But there
are times recently when I have found that it’s not physically possible
for me to work full time and “do it myself!”.

The Redhead talks
about not asking for “stuff”.  I am suffering from the same
affliction.  There is a sense that I should be able to take care
of myself and my family.  I shouldn’t have to ask others for
help.  I’m not sure I can make it myself, but I’m going to give it
my best.  School has started again and we have this week covered
as far as getting to from school and me getting Lindsey to the
rink.  Beyond that I’m not sure how right now how I’m going to do
it.  I will ask for help and have asked for help, and
interestingly have people asking me for help.  It somehow feels
like I’m healing and getting back to normal when there are people out
there having a harder time than I am.  But it will be a real
challenge for me to still work enough hours to keep my job and still be
able to get the girls where they need to go.

Sometimes it seems like they grow up too fast.

Where does the time go. It seems to go faster and faster each day. We are back to school already.

Hmmm…  The clock on my PC was hosed.

“It is news guaranteed to raise a cheer among those who enjoy a glass or two: drinking half a bottle of wine a day can make your brain work better, especially if you are a woman.“

Ok, maybe I do need to try and be the mom.

I think I’ve got the first of the month Radio Userland bug.  The posts I made yesterday and today are showing up as being in July for some reason.

The post from yesterday had nice things to say about Userland and Radio too 🙁