KattyWilly

Cindy bought this Advent Calendar for the kids when they were very
small. We would put little ‘trinkets’ from the elves in the
pockets for the girls to find each morning. I can’t tell you how
many mornings we would wake up in a panic because we forgot to take
care of the elves. One of us would wake up and then gently wake
the other asking “Did the elves come last night?” Which would
lead to either the reponse “yes”, or frantically digging through the
elves bag of gifts to find something for the tree, hopefully before the
girls woke up.

Once the girls realized that the elves were coming every night they
started leaving torn little bits of paper with notes for the
elves. They would ask questions about the elves, “what is your
name”, “what do you look like”, “will you bring me a puppy”?
Cindy and I would write back in our best elven handwriting. I
need to look around, but I think I still have those notes.

Nina talks about remembered love:

“I need something to balance out the lingering pain, and if remembered
love is the best I’ve got right now, well, dammit, I’ll take it.”

I have plenty of remembered love. As I approach three years of only remembered love I wonder.

I have so much love for my daughters, and it feels like I have tons of
love ready for someone, but there is something about the love between
two people that is different than the love for our children, and
different than remembered love.  Is love not complete or full or
real unless it is returned?

I’m looking for wireless Internet access in Olomouc.  I thought I’d put these here in case I need them.

Internet Cafes

Some Hotel

A Shopping District thing

A wireless Hospital?

A Business Wireless Provider

Intel HotSpots

Lupa.cz

One of the skaters at the rink is working on a routine for the upcoming
Holiday show. She is skating to a beautiful song sung by Sarah
McLachlan, “Song For A Winter’s Night“,

“The fire is dying now,
my lamp is growing dim
the shades of night are lifting

The morning light
steals across my windowpane
where webs of snow are drifting

If I could only have you near
to breathe a sigh or two

I would be happy just to hold the hands I love
and to be once again with with you

To be once again with with you”

I may have to ask her to stop picking music that is so … that it makes me cry … frozen teardrops

Here’s a link to the iTunes version of the Nettwerk CD release.

Halley talks about being Alone But Not.
She talks about the feeling that I sometimes get in the early morning when you
wake and are in that tween state of not dreaming and not awake and you
remember a feeling that was so familiar. Something that you may
have felt thousands of times over the years (365 mornings x 23
years). Is this the same phantom feelings that those who have
lost a limb feel? The feeling that someone is there, or should be
there next to you, but you know that they aren’t. Hence the
knowledge that you are alone but somehow you can still feel someone
there. Alone but not.

A little while back I was quoting the lyrics of a Mary Chapin Carpenter song about being Alone But Not Lonely. I think that this feeling of alone but not, can work to magnify the feelings of loneliness.  Leaving you both Alone and Lonely.

Chelsey’s school band played their Winter Concert tonight.  The band sounded great.

What is this some sort of sick early holiday present for Floridians?

I never would have thought I’d be reading a post with mentions of both Kubler-Ross and Horniness
in it.  I started to post something about it and then thought better.

As a father of two daughters I can relate to this photograph of a father and his daughter. 
There is a sense of the deep emotional relationship that there is
between a father and daughter, yet at the same time there is the
knowledge that there are and always will be so many things that they
keep to themselves.